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FUCK IT, I"M GOING TO THE GYM EVERY FUCKING DAY

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Soooooooooooooooo, I had my intervies yesterday for Management. It went very well. I'm not sure of the exact number of people who applied, but I do know that it was a very small amount. The only other person who know applied, was in the intervies fro about 45-50 minutes. I was in there for about 20. I have gone through the interview once vefore so I went in very preparred. I hope that I get a promotion. I would be an amazing oopurtunity.

On the other hand, if I do not get promoted, then that leaves the door open for other oppurtunities. I do not think that I will apply again any time soon. It'll bum me out to have to leave here, but if i don't get a promotion, I'm outta here. I'm gonna start looking elsewhere. I'm gotten a few interview proposals from ohter companies, all of which I have turned down. I should have, at least, called them back to see if it was worth my time.

I;m going to the gym tonight. YOGA. It is so relaxing and I think it will help my back out alot. I kinda threw it out on Sunday. I need to go to the gym EVERYDAY!!!!!!!!!!!

Lost is driving me crazy. I think I know who Ben's guy is on the freightter. I think it is Michael. We'll see if I'm right very soon.

That's it for now. Until next time..... Tey voy a esonar a curear

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So, there’s gonna be a chance that I will be able to apply to be a manger @ work. I know I was talking all that shit about not wanting to be here anymore and blah, blah, blah. If I apply and don’t get it, or if I can’t apply I’m gonna start to look somewhere else. I filled out a resume for Monster.com. I think tonight I’m gonna start looking.
I think it would be cool to be a manager @ The Home Depot.

I just hope that something can turn around in my life. I don’t want to live paycheck to paycheck anymore. Part of my problem is lack of self-respect. I said last week that I was going to start looking for work somewhere else. The only thing I’ve done was create a resume on Monster.com/ I didn’t look into the Sheriff’s thing and I didn’t look into the Military thing.

I don’t know what my problem is. Yesterday, when I was @ work, I told myself that either when I got home, or when the boys were asleep, I was gonna clean the apartment. Did that happen? NOPE. Instead, I fell asleep reading Harry Potter and The Sorcerer’s Stone. Right now, when I get home, later, I want to clean. But it probably won’t happen. Why? Because I know that I have the TV, video games, books, there @ my disposal. This sounds stupid, but I have to be strong. I know that the apartment is filthy. It needs a lot of cleaning. I just have to go home and fucking do it.

I just wish that I would stop saying one thing and doing another. Why can’t I just commit to doing whatever it is I was gonna do? I guess I’ve been like that my whole life! Procrastinating until the something has to be done. Sometimes I’ll procrastinate so long that it’s too late. I’m tired of doing late. That is the reason why I didn’t get the Dispatching job. I’m such an idiot. I wanna be a better person. I have the desire to do so, but not the willpower. WHAT THE FUCK MAN!!!!!!

That’s fucking it for now. Until next time…. Fuck it!!!!